If we always knew the result of an event, we would miss all the great experiences. We typically look at something in the moment and wonder how or why, sometimes you will know the answer and sometimes you will not but none of that matters. The only thing that matters is what you take away from an event, how you move on and what you do with it.
About six years ago I went through a divorce, at the time it seemed horrible. I did not know how it happened or why. The worst part was watching what my kids went through. Even though they were technically adults it was still hard for them. They did not understand what was happening or why, if I didn’t how could they? but that left the three of us together and we just talked and helped each other. Today things could not be better. As I looked back at that moment the hardest part was helping them through the event and knowing how badly their trust in a parent, their mother was damaged. For me, I never left their side and I never will.
I figured out pretty quick that the end of that marriage was a relief. The result of this Journey could not be more perfect. I could not be happier, I met a wonderful woman and finally know what it is like to have a real partner and friend. We married a year after meeting and this May will be our fifth wedding anniversary. I now have three kids; my two, who are doing well, perfectly adjusted and well on their way with their lives. I also now have another son from our marriage and I have had the most amazing time watching him grow from a shy 12-year-old kid to a fine young man with a great heart on the verge of graduating high school. We do drive my wife crazy at night with some of our conversations and antics. He is my kid in every way and he will always know I got him no matter what. I also had a stepdad (he was my dad) to guide me so I learned from the best. I will have a later post on that.
My wife is truly my partner and best friend and she is way smarter than me. I never really knew what that meant when I heard it in the past, probably because I never experienced it. She knows how I think and feel, almost in a scary way. She cares for me in a way it took time to understand; I would feel guilty if I was not doing something I thought I should be doing and she is telling me to take a nap or relax because I worked too hard this week. There are so many things like that I could go on forever…
We are different in many ways; by culture, where we grew up, and our backgrounds but like I said earlier none of that matters it is what we do with that that counts. What means the most; we talk, we always talk and most of all we laugh, we always laugh. We just love being together no matter what and that could even be doing grocery!
Some of our best times are just sitting and talking and we talk about everything; politics, religion, sports, our youth, there is no topic we don’t cover and we have had times when we just chat for hours.
Not only did I get a son, I also now have this amazing extended family; two sisters, a father in law, and their families. My wife got a mother and father in law and they love her and she loves them. My dad said he had a dream at one point he was going to have another grand kid. He was correct.
We have formed this great family. We have three kids and they are brothers and sisters. Two of them are older and don’t live with us. However because we all experienced the journey together, we love each other and that is what matters.
This was a really great journey …