What’s Something You Do Completely Differently From How You Were Raised?

Two main things come to mind.

The first is how I communicate. My mom was a screamer. Her normal method of communication was, well, screaming. If she wanted to make a point, you were going to hear it. Even if there were no point to be made, which was usually the case, she still screamed.

I’m pretty much the opposite. I don’t scream or raise my voice much, if at all. I took after my dad on this. I can’t think of a time when I ever yelled at my kids. I never felt that raising your voice was a particularly effective way to get your point across. If someone is already listening, why make it necessary to listen louder?

The second—and probably more important—difference is being present.

I played sports my entire life, and there were only two or three times when a parent ever attended one of my games. I remember what that felt like, and I wanted something different for my kids.

All of them played sports at some point or participated in activities, and I made it a priority to be there.

My oldest son was the most active. He played hockey and was at the skating rink four or five times a week, sometimes with multiple games on the weekends. Out of hundreds of events, I missed only two.

My other son played soccer, basketball, and volleyball, and we made it to his events. I never missed my daughter’s dance performances either.

Looking back, I don’t think my kids will remember every game, practice, tournament, or dance performance. They probably won’t remember the score of most of them either.

But I hope they remember that I was there.

That’s something I was raised without, and something I made sure they never had to wonder about.

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